When I worked as a Clinical Psychotherapist, the greatest challenge for me was working with couples. The picture above says it all - when couples are stuck and defensive with one another, it is usually long, hard work to get them to begin opening up again.
OptiKodes offer a very powerful way to help couple's see each other in a very clear and non-judgmental way. When couples I work with first see their different OptiKodes they immediately realize that their tension patterns are partly stemming from the inevitable differences in their Functional Styles. This usually creates immediate breakthroughs. Instead of blaming each other for not understanding or meeting their needs, they see that their partner's different OptiKode simply creates a different Functional Style with unique rhythms and preferences.
Seeing their different OptiKodes, partners spontaneously grow more curious about each other because they have a new framework for truly seeing the dynamics of each other's OptiKodes. This naturally leads to more mutual understanding and harmony. Intimacy then flourishes as the couple gets better at staying attuned to each other's OptiKodes.
Being able to understand and work with each other's OptiKodes is what I call 'OptiTuning.' Its a very rare and powerful tool to have in life. Being able to interact with others while knowing the similarities and differences between your Functional Styles creates immediate breakthroughs.
These days neuroscience is discovering that humans are intrinsically wired for connection with each other. With OptiKodes I am revealing the depths of how differently humans function. In my work with OptiKodes I am endeavoring to make our human drives for connection and functioning work together seamlessly. When how we connect and how we function harmonize well. we have easier access to the satisfying lives and relationships we seek.
In my next post, OptiKodes for Couples - Part 2, I will give specific examples of how I have used OptiKodes in couples' relationships. Seeing and identifying with these examples will give you more of a sense of the way in which OptiTuning and OptiKodes can transform lives and relationships.